Greater American Confidence Party
Official Website
A message from Pop Haydn
Pop Haydn
I am proud to announce that I have once again become the nominee of the Greater American Confidence Party for President of the United States.
I am so happy for this opportunity!
I want to thank you all for your support!
I am sorry that the convention and its activities were not announced publicly, but we thought it best to keep the convention completely under the radar of the other parties and their candidates.
Without any real or living delegates or politicians, we were able to have a nearly perfect convention–no hiccups, no mistakes, no goofs.
I intend to reveal no details of my plans for changes once I am in office either—no one wants to watch sausage being made…
I will be just like any other politician; but if you elect me you won’t feel like such a dupe!
You will know what you are getting, and can never be disappointed…
I do not intend to even mention the other two candidates much less sling dirt on them. I don’t think I am any better a person than either of the other major candidates.
Instead of attacks against my opponents—I intend to run on ideas. It is a lot cheaper than coal or gas and I have an endless supply.
I want to govern from the center, with the money people and special interests on one side and the politicians on the other—I will be cutting up the pot.
The people will be getting the same deal as always, but I promise to lower the overhead through better management.
The Greater American Confidence Party, or the "New Greenback Party" as we like to call ourselves, represent that thin and eccentric "sanity fringe" of American politics. A vote for us is a vote--not for better government--but for cheaper and more honest government.
I believe that in voting for me for president in 2016, you will be getting the kind of government you both expect and deserve.
I am exactly the kind of person and politician anyone with the sense God gave a grape would assume me to be; I don't make any pretenses.
But I am not greedy, and I am not an elitist--I will split 50/50 with anyone, great or small.
We will give you the same kind of government you have grown to expect, but at a much cheaper price.
I think that we can find a way to outsource the Congress and the Senate, by getting much cheaper politicians from third world nations.
They may not be any better than our own politicians, but they could work for much lower benefits and pay and are used to a much smaller scale of graft.
I think that it is only fair that our politicians play on a level playing field with the politicians from impoverished nations, and I am convinced they can still compete in the political marketplace if they give it that old American "We can do it!" attitude.
But the easy-flying days are over!
Our politicians need to regain their edge by competing for their jobs with the tough and hungry politicians of the third world. I think that most of them will make it. Some few may need retraining in a different field.
This could really be better for everyone.
There are a lot of experienced, avaricious and ruthless politicians out of jobs right now because of the disruptions in the Middle East and Africa.
I think they could quickly adapt to the Washington environment, and would have every bit the concern for the welfare of the American working people as those who are there now.
I want to crowd source the government. Like Kickstarter or Indiegogo, a site would be set up where people could pay their taxes by itemizing their contribution—you can spend part of your tax money on bombs or warplanes, and some of it on roads or welfare.
Various agencies will have to appeal to the public for support, and the taxpayers get to contribute to the programs they like the best–buy the country a bomb, or build some schools?
Each government agency will have to make their case for funding directly to the people.
They may need to come up with perks and rewards for their supporters…maybe offer a ride on a tank, or something.
I think this will get people interested in government.
I only lie once in a very great while…and then only when cornered or provoked or under pressure for time. I always tell the truth even if the path to the truth is a bit convoluted.
I promise you I will never lie to the American people without a really, really good reason.
So here’s the truth, I am in it for myself, folks!
I only want the money.
Power means little to me, as it requires too great a degree of responsibility. But I am not that greedy a person, either. I just want to live comfortably with little effort.
In return I will organize the crime and graft in Washington. I will cut out all the middlemen, eliminate duplication and therefore reduce the expense to the public.
I will provide the same quality of government that the people are used to having, but at a much lower cost!
Organized crime is cheaper, safer and more efficient.
Some people see the many great challenges facing government—I see the many great opportunities facing me…
I plan to work really hard to achieve things I couldn't have considered possible without your encouragement, your unalloyed trust.
A year from now no matter who wins this election–provided it isn’t me, which is almost guaranteed–you will be able to say:
“Don’t blame me–I voted for Pop!”
--Pop Haydn
Certifiable Genius
I am so happy for this opportunity!
I want to thank you all for your support!
I am sorry that the convention and its activities were not announced publicly, but we thought it best to keep the convention completely under the radar of the other parties and their candidates.
Without any real or living delegates or politicians, we were able to have a nearly perfect convention–no hiccups, no mistakes, no goofs.
I intend to reveal no details of my plans for changes once I am in office either—no one wants to watch sausage being made…
I will be just like any other politician; but if you elect me you won’t feel like such a dupe!
You will know what you are getting, and can never be disappointed…
I do not intend to even mention the other two candidates much less sling dirt on them. I don’t think I am any better a person than either of the other major candidates.
Instead of attacks against my opponents—I intend to run on ideas. It is a lot cheaper than coal or gas and I have an endless supply.
I want to govern from the center, with the money people and special interests on one side and the politicians on the other—I will be cutting up the pot.
The people will be getting the same deal as always, but I promise to lower the overhead through better management.
The Greater American Confidence Party, or the "New Greenback Party" as we like to call ourselves, represent that thin and eccentric "sanity fringe" of American politics. A vote for us is a vote--not for better government--but for cheaper and more honest government.
I believe that in voting for me for president in 2016, you will be getting the kind of government you both expect and deserve.
I am exactly the kind of person and politician anyone with the sense God gave a grape would assume me to be; I don't make any pretenses.
But I am not greedy, and I am not an elitist--I will split 50/50 with anyone, great or small.
We will give you the same kind of government you have grown to expect, but at a much cheaper price.
I think that we can find a way to outsource the Congress and the Senate, by getting much cheaper politicians from third world nations.
They may not be any better than our own politicians, but they could work for much lower benefits and pay and are used to a much smaller scale of graft.
I think that it is only fair that our politicians play on a level playing field with the politicians from impoverished nations, and I am convinced they can still compete in the political marketplace if they give it that old American "We can do it!" attitude.
But the easy-flying days are over!
Our politicians need to regain their edge by competing for their jobs with the tough and hungry politicians of the third world. I think that most of them will make it. Some few may need retraining in a different field.
This could really be better for everyone.
There are a lot of experienced, avaricious and ruthless politicians out of jobs right now because of the disruptions in the Middle East and Africa.
I think they could quickly adapt to the Washington environment, and would have every bit the concern for the welfare of the American working people as those who are there now.
I want to crowd source the government. Like Kickstarter or Indiegogo, a site would be set up where people could pay their taxes by itemizing their contribution—you can spend part of your tax money on bombs or warplanes, and some of it on roads or welfare.
Various agencies will have to appeal to the public for support, and the taxpayers get to contribute to the programs they like the best–buy the country a bomb, or build some schools?
Each government agency will have to make their case for funding directly to the people.
They may need to come up with perks and rewards for their supporters…maybe offer a ride on a tank, or something.
I think this will get people interested in government.
I only lie once in a very great while…and then only when cornered or provoked or under pressure for time. I always tell the truth even if the path to the truth is a bit convoluted.
I promise you I will never lie to the American people without a really, really good reason.
So here’s the truth, I am in it for myself, folks!
I only want the money.
Power means little to me, as it requires too great a degree of responsibility. But I am not that greedy a person, either. I just want to live comfortably with little effort.
In return I will organize the crime and graft in Washington. I will cut out all the middlemen, eliminate duplication and therefore reduce the expense to the public.
I will provide the same quality of government that the people are used to having, but at a much lower cost!
Organized crime is cheaper, safer and more efficient.
Some people see the many great challenges facing government—I see the many great opportunities facing me…
I plan to work really hard to achieve things I couldn't have considered possible without your encouragement, your unalloyed trust.
A year from now no matter who wins this election–provided it isn’t me, which is almost guaranteed–you will be able to say:
“Don’t blame me–I voted for Pop!”
--Pop Haydn
Certifiable Genius
For more campaign materials, memorabilia
and novelties:
At Pop's Dry Goods, you can find all sorts of campaign materials including yard signs, posters, bumper stickers, cups, clocks and blankets featuring Steve Mitchell's wonderful campaign designs.
Just click HERE or on the photo to the right to be taken to our store.
Show that you are still a part of the American democratic process, even if you don't support either of the traditional "majority" parties. Vote for the Sanity Fringe!
"IN SANITY WE TRUST!"
The Sanity Fringe of American Politics
Pop Haydn on the Campaign Trail
There has always been a strain of American Politics that didn't take itself or the process really seriously, and that pin-pricked the pompous actors that move through each election season like Thanksgiving Day parade balloons.
One thing that should never be in short supply is the ability to laugh at ourselves and at those who would run things.
Pop will be happy if he can make people think, and make them laugh.
The sanity fringe now has its own party, and its card-carrying members are part of a proud tradition of irreverence and good old American balloon-bursting.
Other champions of the sanity fringe in the past have
included people like presidential candidate Pat Paulsen, as well as writers like H. L. Mencken, Will Rogers and Mark Twain.
One thing that should never be in short supply is the ability to laugh at ourselves and at those who would run things.
Pop will be happy if he can make people think, and make them laugh.
The sanity fringe now has its own party, and its card-carrying members are part of a proud tradition of irreverence and good old American balloon-bursting.
Other champions of the sanity fringe in the past have
included people like presidential candidate Pat Paulsen, as well as writers like H. L. Mencken, Will Rogers and Mark Twain.
Mark Twain
"It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly American criminal class except Congress."
"Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself."
-- Mark Twain
"Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself."
-- Mark Twain
Will Rogers
"This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer."
-- Will Rogers
H. L. Mencken
"Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want and deserve to get it good and hard."
-- H. L. Mencken
Pat Paulsen
"All the problems we face in the United States today can be traced to an unenlightened immigration policy on the part of the American Indian."
--Pat Paulsen
--Pat Paulsen
Stephen Colbert
“If this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn't help the poor, either we have to pretend that Jesus was just as selfish as we are, or we've got to acknowledge that He commanded us to love the poor and serve the needy without condition and then admit that we just don't want to do it.”
― Stephen Colbert
― Stephen Colbert
Our Mascot, the Weasel
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The American Confidence Party
Some of our proud members:
Disclaimer: Members may or may not agree with any or all positions of Pop Haydn
or the American Confidence Party. They joined not knowing and not caring about
what those positions might be, so please don't hold them responsible.
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